


Lick it up

by VulgarSequins



Series: Devoted to only you [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Blasphemy, Blow Jobs, Come Marking, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, Fantasizing, Hand Jobs, Intercrural Sex, M/M, Masturbation, Mention of torture, Possessive Daryl, Post-Coital Cuddling, Reunions, Rimming, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Hatred, Submissive Rick, Violence, dominant daryl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-11-17
Packaged: 2018-05-23 15:22:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6120781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VulgarSequins/pseuds/VulgarSequins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl has wanted to own Rick since the moment he met him. Rick, however, is married and a straight guy that has waltzed in his life and possibly killed his brother by handcuffing him to a rooftop. </p><p>Merle can take care of himself. Daryl can take care of himself. Daryl can take care of Rick too.</p><p>(Daryl's point of view in the Genuflect universe.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. No Take Backs

**Author's Note:**

> So, in order to avoid forcing the story of Genuflect, I decided to do Daryl's point of view on some of these matters so we can get an idea of what's going on in his head. Different writing style is meant [at least the tone] since we are dealing with a different character's mentality. I kind of needed this because I'm stuck on Genuflect/it's progression because it would come off as a jump without Daryl's thoughts. Oops. It will get there kids. Hope you don't mind!!
> 
> I can't thank you all enough for all the love you have given my little story!! And the other ones/parts I've written as well! It's all the encouragement I need and it pushes me to at least update something weekly. Thank you!
> 
> [Also, title is a nod to Reedus' love for KISS, and mine as well. I pretty much just loop their stuff when writing for Daryl. Them or Nirvana.]

"Tastes like Holy Water." 

Daryl didn't know what the fuck Holy Water tasted like. He had only gone to church when his momma would make him go every Christmas and Easter. He never went back after she had died. Daryl used to even pray to God. He would pray every night before he went to sleep that his daddy would stay knocked out so he wouldn't get knocked out as well from Daddy Dixon's fists. He would pray that Merle would sober up, stay clean, and take him away from the Hell that was the Dixon home. When that didn't work and Merle continued to be his fuck up brother, he prayed that Merle would never come back; maybe get a bad batch of heroine and not wake up from passing out. 

He only prayed for that once.

Teenage Daryl cried for two hours after he realized what he muttered under his breath when he walked in on a passed out Merle that wouldn't wake from a few shakes and punches.

He never prayed again after that. God had a way of making you remember your place in life and how you are, in fact, nothing in this world but his play things. He had a sick sense of humor. 

Then the world ended and  Sheriff Nice Ass strutted in to his life with eyes that looked like the sky lived in them and legs that bowed and were sin. Daryl was thankful that Rick had confessed what he had done to Merle, because the sudden rage that filled his chest took care of the awkward erection he sprung when Rick first looked at him. He was also thankful Merle wasn't around to see him throw a line of squirrels at the newcomer because he **knew** his smart ass brother would make some dumb shit comment about courting Rick; trying to show he could provide for him, or who knows what the fuck else weird shit would come from his mouth.

Starting from that moment, Daryl just wanted to be near Rick. Just to feel his heat, hear his southern drawl, maybe look in to those eyes or stare at the man's lips for a inappropriate amount of time to use as spank bank material when he managed to grab a moment alone. This was also when Daryl started praying to God again.

He didn't pray for the world to right itself again; there were plenty of people doing that already and it was obvious that the request was falling on deaf ears.

He didn't pray for Merle to be okay or to come back; the dumb ass wouldn't die unless he wanted to die and Daryl knew that Merle was out there raising Hell for whoever he happened to come across.

No, instead Daryl prayed for Rick Grimes. He prayed that this strong willed, confident, and sexy as fuck of a man stayed around and didn't get himself killed like Merle and he had seen a handful of times before they found their little band of fuck ups now led by the ex-deputy.

The **second** ex-deputy to lead them, and boy, did it ever send a thrill down Daryl's spine to watch Rick rip the reigns from that asshole, Shane, and take over. Daryl was not a fan of Shane since meeting the man. World was dead now, but that asshole’s cop mentality wasn’t. Yeah, Merle and Daryl usually were on the wrong side of the law, his brother more so, but they were good people. Well, Daryl was. He thought he was anyway. To an extent.

The first day Daryl and Rick had met, it was nothing but tension. Hard stares and words dripping with venom and anger were thrown between them. Every command that Rick spoke to lead the group of four men with, made Daryl’s dick twitch in his pants. Rick playing leader and man in charge. When the deputy bucked up and challenged him in the abandoned building in Atlanta, Daryl knew then that he was going to own this man and make him beg.

He had to take a moment after that to calm his half hard dick down. It was difficult to walk around with a boner as it was; Daryl did not jump at the opportunity to try and go running through Atlanta with the dead behind him and a stiffy in his pants to see how it compared to teenage years. 

Now though, he had just jerked Rick fucking Grimes off in a church in front of Jesus himself. Daryl would find that thought much more funny later on in his life, but for now he just smirked at the orgasm dazed man before him. His pink tongue dragged across his knuckles and palm, cleaning Rick’s come off and savoring it. 

It had been too long since he had touched a man, much less tasted them. How he wanted to shove Rick back against the alter and do just what he said he would do next time. Maybe he could convince Rick to come back tomorrow night. Judging by his stupid smile, it wouldn’t take much persuasion. 

Daryl would kill to see Rick spread out on the alter before him. He would kneel and pray to this man and the Heaven between his legs. He wanted to push inside, push into what he **knew** would be, tight and warm heat with fingers, tongue, and cock. He wanted to hear Rick beg, moan, and scream his name. Daryl wanted to swallow up those noises and ruin this man. He wanted to fill-

“Fuck, Daryl,” Rick’s voice was breathless as he rubbed at his face with his beautiful hands. Daryl caught the glint of Rick’s wedding band and his stomach instantly soured.

_That’s right dip shit. Rick’s married. To Lori._

_But she’s fuckin’ Asshole so it’s okay._

_Ya can fuck ‘em. He wants it._

_Ya do this every. fuckin’. time._

_Set yerself up for this every time ya fuck a married man._

Daryl’s eyes narrowed at the ring on Rick’s finger, glaring at the inanimate object that mocked him. He turned on his heel and started walking back to the church entrance, grabbing his crossbow when he reached the large wooden doors.

“Ya gonna head back or nah?” Daryl threw back over his shoulder when he pushed one door open, his eyes scanning outside and his body taking over and going into survival mode. The echo of Rick scrambling to put himself together and catch up masked his own frustrated grunt that escaped his lips; his hand moving off his crossbow briefly to readjust his cock in his cargos. Regardless of the anger and self pity Daryl was throwing at himself, he was still sporting quite the hard on.

“H-Hey, Daryl! Hang on,” Rick drew closer but Daryl kept his eyes focused on the dark before him. “Hey, do you want me to take care of ya- Daryl?”

Oh how he wanted Rick to take care of him. He wouldnt have to do much, just open up that pretty mouth of his. Rick wouldn't even have to do that. He could just stay on his knees and Daryl could take care of himself. Paint Rick's face all pretty with his come, but Daryl was already stepping in to the grass and moving towards the woods. A fleeting thought of regret passed him, knowing he had ignored Rick, but he was positive the other man would understand. He knew Rick would follow and was not disappointed when he was proven right. He was grateful that Rick stayed quiet during the trek back to camp, even if he was fucking thunder stomping along the way. It didn’t make Daryl’s job easier by any means. 

Daryl was desperate to make it back to camp and wanted to collapse when they made it. The trip took longer than expected, having to avoid the dead when they stumbled upon a few. He would take off in a sprint if he didn’t hate running and his erection had flagged even just slightly. Instead his body betrayed him and he was still standing at attention. 

He glanced back to make sure Rick was okay and that there was nothing following them. Rick’s eyes caught Daryl’s and his plush lips parted to say something.

_Fuck, should’a kissed him stupid…_

Daryl grunted a dismissive ‘good night’ before hurrying back to his tent. He hoped Rick was already inside his tent with his **wife** so Daryl could avoid the embarrassment in struggling to get in his own tent. 

If anyone had thrown his crossbow aside like he had just done, he would have pulled a knife on their throat and shouted a curse or two about how he would gut them like a pig. However, he didn’t give a flying fuck in this moment. Daryl flopped down on his sorry excuse of a bed and tugged his pants open; his breath already coming out in sharp gasps. 

He failed in biting back the loud moan that escaped his lips when his calloused hand wrapped around his thick cock. It wouldn’t take long for him to come and he knew it. His body was buzzing from watching Rick come apart. Rick fucking Grimes. He bent so easy under Daryl’s force. 

Daryl would be a liar if he said that didn’t turn him on as much as touching Rick’s pretty cock did. 

_But he’s married to that cheating wife o’ his. Why’s it always gotta be a married guy? Almost told him tonight. He’s such a good man, but fuck he’s dumb when it comes to Shane and Lori._

_Too good a man._

_He needs me takin’ care of him or he’s gonna get fucked out here. Shit, I wanna fuck him so bad._

Daryl twisted his wrist on the upstroke just in that moment, groaning loud again. He tightened his fist around his throbbing cock, grateful for the amount of precome he had dripping from his slit to ease the friction into something sweet to fuck up in. He closed his eyes and dropped his head back on to his pillow, picturing Rick above him and riding down on his cock.

Daryl’s hips bucked up, another groan escaping his lips and his hand working himself over faster. His mind provided Rick’s meek little moans and praises on loop in his mind. He was so thankful he followed the other man to the church. Things turned out so much better than he expected and he knew it would get better from there. 

Rick wanted him back. Rick didn’t push him away or curse at him. He didn’t look at him like he had lost his mind when Daryl had first grabbed Rick’s dick through his pants. No, instead he just made this squeak of a half assed protest and grabbed Daryl’s wrist. Rick was as hard as he is now in his hand when he grabbed him. 

Then Rick admitted that he had thoughts of Daryl fucking him. Bending him over to be exact. Daryl’s hand ticked up a notch in speed, his mind providing the vivid daydream of the fantasy. Rick flushed and panting out Daryl’s name. 

Rick’s pants tugged down his slim hips, spreading himself wide open in front of Daryl and just begging for his cock. Daryl would bend him over the bricks beside his tent and fuck him out in the open.

Or better yet, fuck him in the middle of camp. He couldn’t give two shits what Andea, T-dog, Glenn, or Dale said or thought. He did, to an extent, but he knew they wouldn’t have the balls to say anything to him.

No, what Daryl **really** wanted, was to shove his cock in to Rick’s tight little ass in front of his no good cheating wife and bastard “best friend”. Maybe he would bend him over his bike and fuck him there. He wanted Rick to scream his name in pleasure and beg for more. Beg for him to fuck him harder, to let him come, and Daryl knew he would deliver. 

He’d hold on to Rick’s hips tight enough to leave bruises, marks of ownership, when he first speared him on his thick cock. Fuck, Rick would be so tight around him. He would be perfect and amazing for Daryl. His greedy ass would take him in and squeeze just so and Daryl would fucking pound into Rick and hit that sweet spot every time, making Rick scream and cry for it. Daryl wouldn’t even need to jerk Rick. No, Rick would come from being untouched. Daryl would make sure he got it good. He wanted Rick to come with a shout and shoot his thick come all over his bike. Stain the metal and leather with it.

Then Daryl would keep fucking into Rick, glaring at Lori and Shane until Rick’s body squeezed a little too tight around his cock. Lori and Shane didn’t deserve Rick. Rick needed him. Rick wanted him. Daryl’s eyes would roll back and he would thrust deep in one more time, flush with Rick’s tight body. Daryl would pour come so deep in to Rick; so deep, it would be sliding out of his body before he even had a chance to pull out. Rick’s body would be forever marked inside as Daryl’s.

Daryl hissed and arched his hips up, feet planted when his balls tightened and the force of his orgasm hit him. He squeezed around his jerking cock as he came, his hot come shooting up and hitting his chest. Another good shirt ruined, but Daryl couldn’t be bothered to even give a shit. Instead his brain was quiet and stupid from his orgasm; just one thought being repeated over and over and over.

_Rick is mine._


	2. Remember boy, you ain't nothin' but a redneck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's one thing after another. Sophia dead. Rick running off. Lori bothering him.
> 
> What is he even doing here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the filler kiddos. This is like, the first chapter I've written where someone isn't having an orgasm. I know, a tragedy. 
> 
> Just getting a little more in Daryl's headspace so I can continue Genuflect. I'm really sorry about the lack of updates. My life/work life just got soooo crazy. This may come off as Lori bashing, but remember, this part of Genuflect universe is from Daryl's POV and he's not very happy/teetering on a bad place right now.

Daryl was pissed. 

The memory of Sophia walking to their group, dead but walking, still made his stomach churn. He just knew they would find her. He went and looked every fucking day. He took a bolt and bullet to find her. He faced past internal demons to look for Carol’s little girl.

Only to find out she had been in the barn all this time they were here. Sophia had been rotting in the Greene’s barn. She was right there next to them. Daryl had been stewing in his own disappointment and self hate since Rick put a bullet in that girl’s head.

He felt like he had failed Sophia and Carol. He had made promises to the mother that he would find her; that everything would be okay. He could do this. He could be useful to the group. He wasn’t just some redneck tracker that happened to be good at hunting. He could have prevented Carol losing herself in despair over her daughter if he had just acted faster. If he was smarter, faster, Sophia would be with Carol instead of in the ground rotting away. Carol wouldn't be the quiet, broken shell of a woman he first met. 

No. Instead, Sophia was now dead in the ground thanks to him. He didn’t find her in time. He knew he should have went running in to the woods after her and Rick…

Rick. Mother fucking Rick fucking Grimes. The man had a hero complex or some shit. He was always running after someone’s dumb ass that needed saving, set aside Sophia. Grown ass men that were dumb asses; like his brother and Hershel. Daryl would have let the old man go run off on his own. He knew the dangers that were out there. Hershel was an idiot in the first place thinking his family was just sick. Hell no, they were dead. Just like Sophia. 

Now Rick may just as well be dead. Who did he bring with him? Glenn. Not to give the kid any Hell, but he was still wet around the ears. The kid was a runner, not a fighter. Daryl carved a thick cut into the arrow he was attempting to make. 

_At least the dumb ass didn’t take Asshole…_

That would have just been the cherry on this shit sundae. Rick’s dumb ass was on a fool’s run to bring back some delusional veterinarian turned doctor and the last thing he needed was this piece of shit to go with him. It would have been perfect for Shane to take out both men. Both Rick and Hershel were the heads of households or groups. Shane would have everything he wanted. All that control. 

Daryl barely missed his thumb on the upsweep of his blade against the grain. 

“Moving to the suburbs?”

Then we have this bitch. Lori fucking Grimes. Daryl could barely hold back the growl from his throat. What in hell would this woman want with him? He wasn’t Shane, so it definitely wasn’t his dick. Daryl kept whittling, hoping she would get the point that he wasn’t in the mood to talk.

“Listen, Beth’s in some kind of catatonic shock. We need Hershel.”

“Yeah?” Daryl refused to look at her. He knew that she was about to ask. He wasn’t some errand boy. “So what?”

“So I need you to run into town real quick,” Lori knelt down but kept her distance from Daryl. Her voice soothing but still came off as condescending. No one around here thought Daryl had a brain bigger than a squirrel and it was really starting to piss him off. “Bring him and Rick back… Daryl.”

“Yer bitch went window shoppin’,” Daryl finally looked up at Lori, his expression as unfriendly as he could muster, which happened to be fairly easy. If he was going to go after Rick, it would be on his terms and not because his cheating wife wanting him back to guilt trip him in to fuck knows what. Besides, it was still daylight out. Rick would be fine. “You want ‘em, fetch him yerself. I got better things to do.”

“What’s the matter with you?” Lori furrowed her brows and looked at him with a mixture of confusion and irritation at his response and blasé attitude. “Why would you be so selfish?”

This bitch.

This **selfish** bitch wanted to call **him** selfish? This woman, who was too busy getting her rocks off to watch her own damn kid or give two rat’s ass about her husband being in some coma in a hospital? This crazy woman that got knocked up in the damn apocalypse has the balls to call him selfish?

Something snapped in Daryl and his hackles raised.

“Selfish!?” Daryl jumped up and turned to Lori, stepping away from her and putting distance between them. He refused to let this get out of hand. She was still part of their group, and Rick’s wife.

_Cheating whore wife. See how messy it gets when ya fuck around with a married ass?_

Rick would have nothing to do with him if anything escalated past curse words. Daryl would never let it, but Lori was a wild card. He didn’t know shit about her.

“Listen to me, Olive Oil,” Daryl snarled at her as his rage bubbled up, his accent running thicker with each sentence. “I was out there lookin’ for that lil’ girl every **single** day. I took a bullet and an arrow in the process! Don’chu tell me about gettin’ mah hands dirty!”

Lori flinched away from Daryl when he lifted up his knife. He wasn’t going to hurt her. He may not like her, but he would never lay his hands on her. It was just heat of the moment. Emphasize his words, but the flinch itself cut him deep. She looked like his momma. When his daddy would get belligerent. Daryl quickly lowered the knife and stepped back, taking deep breaths to calm down.

He didn’t want to scare anyone like his daddy did, and he sure as hell didn’t need to be fighting those memories again. 

“Ya want those two idiots? Have a nice ride!” Daryl turned away from Lori, avoiding her eyes. “I’m done lookin’ for people…” He sat back down and started carving at the wood again, still avoiding her gaze. His hands were shaking and he prayed to whatever God was out there that she couldn’t see it. When he heard Lori walking away, he glanced after her. Regret lay heavy in his stomach. Yes, he didn’t like Lori, but she didn’t deserve that. She said she wanted Hershel and Rick back, but Daryl knew just as much as her that she was just worried about Rick. He couldn’t blame her.

Daryl let out a heavy sigh before leaning back against the bricks behind him. His steel blue eyes looked at the sun making its descent.

_It’s not night yet… Rick will be okay. He will come back. That idiot better come back for me._

_…Not just for her._

_Please not for her…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bother me on tumblr or something. I love talking to new people /grabby hands/


	3. Build you up just to have others tear you down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl feels like he's made progress with Rick's fragile state and overcoming his own past baggage of emotions and experiences.
> 
> Just so it can be undone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please accept this update as a token of my gratitude for you guys sticking with me through my busy life crisis. I think I'm back on track in regards to dedicating time to writing! Of course that could all change so fast. Hahaha. Remember, this little chapter fic is from Daryl's POV of the Genuflect story~ they do go hand in hand. Just his insight.
> 
> Crazy shout outs to my beta, finalomen and my cheerleader zombae for reminding me that the term I was looking for was "intercrural sex". I have no idea why I couldn't remember that.

“All right, back to business,” Daryl turned to face Randall, the warmth he held on his face with Rick no longer present in his features. Randall flinched away from Daryl when the man reached up to tug off the blindfold keeping his red rag in the young man’s mouth. His hand yanked the cloth out and started wiping his hand clean, not bothering to spare Randall a glance. “So, enjoyed the show? Ya probably the only guy now that got to see any type of porn-“

“You’re gay?” These were not the first words Daryl had expected to come out of the kid’s mouth. He was anticipating more begging for his shitty life, but this new world continued to surprise him. 

“Nah, I just whip my dick out for any guy around,” Daryl rolled his eyes and tucked his rag back into his back pocket.

“That guy- Rick, h-he’s straight,” Randall stated, trying to stall Daryl’s torture. “He’s married to that one lady. That kid’s theirs-“

A swift punch to Randall’s gut ended his words. Daryl’s lip was pulled in an annoyed snarl. 

“Looks like ya ain’t as dumb as I pinned ya,” Daryl tilted his head, watching Randall swing from the meat hook. “If yer real smart, keep yer mouth shut. Ya mutter a peep to anybody, I **will** gut ya.”

“Y-Yes Sir,” Randall coughed and tried grasping for anything else he could stall the man with that wouldn’t result in more damage to his body. “B-but what if she finds out?”

“Ain’t none of yer business,” Daryl was looking around the barn for his knife. “The wives never find out their husbands been takin’ dick from me. Husbands usually end it long before the risk. Here we go.” 

Daryl hummed and picked up his knife where it lay on the ground, turning to face Randall with an emotionless expression.

“So, how bad did yer men hurt that man when ya were being a piece o’ shit to those girls?”

* * *

Daryl absently twirled one of Rick’s curls around his finger, his other hand laying possessively on Rick’s back. The older man laying on his chest was sound asleep, his soft snores the only noise in the RV. 

When Daryl carried Rick to the bed, he not only surprised Rick but himself. He had never done something like that to someone he was sleeping with; he wasn’t that kind of guy. It was such a foreign and intimate gesture, although playful. Rick couldn’t hide his embarrassed smile and it remained after Daryl laid him on the bed. Daryl stripped out of his shirt and boots, leaving his pants on just in case he was needed or trouble showed up, making sure his crossbow was within reach along with his knife. 

Daryl had only stayed the night with a handful of his past romps in his life. He wasn’t the type of man to hang around, or keep others overnight for that matter. When living with Merle, when he was out of jail anyway, Daryl had made it a point to not let any of the men he fucked stay in his home longer than necessary. He always made it clear that it was a one and done situation. 

That was for most of the guys he slept with. The ones he **wanted** to stay the night with, the ones he wanted to just lay in bed and listen to them breathe like he was doing with Rick now, always were the ones that had to run home to their wives. They were always the ones that broke his heart. They were the ones that would make fucking promises of leaving their wives for him. They were the ones that promised a home life he ached and craved for, and he was stupid enough to believe a couple. Well, really just one man in particular. When that ended, Daryl hit rock bottom for some time trying to crawl out of the mud of that adultery fuck up.

Daryl exhaled heavily in the quiet room, looking down at Rick’s head full of curls. 

_Guess he’s the first ya actually get to sleep with. Figures. Takes dead fuckers tryin’ ta eat us to make it happen…_

_Still married though._

_He could still be lying… He could wake up and tell me to get the fuck out._

Daryl knew the situation they all were in was beyond fucked up. Rick was still married to Lori, and was still trying to work things out with her when they started this. Of course, Lori was with Shane which was before Merle and him even showed up to their camp. Realizing that took the Dixons all of ten minutes to see how Shane postured around camp and Lori. 

However, here Rick was in his arms. Daryl couldn’t help the self indulgent smirk that ticked his lips upwards. Even if this was just for the night because of Rick’s exhaustion, he would take what he could. 

When Rick had run off after Hershel to bring the man back, Daryl was furious. It wasn’t safe and it was absolutely stupid on Hershel’s part to go running off just to have some pity party. It was stupid as hell for Rick and Glenn to risk their lives to bring him back, and Daryl was pissed Rick had even entertained the idea. He couldn’t help but side with Lori on that one.

Until he remembered how angry he was at Rick for leaving Merle cuffed to a building. He was so lost in anger, worry, attraction, irritation, and disbelief that he was willing to go running in to Atlanta guns blazing to find his brother. 

So maybe he understood were Hershel was coming from in his blind grief. Daryl could sympathize with that now, but only because Rick came back home in one piece. 

However, not before he spent the entire night hissing and spitting like a feral cat at anyone that came to talk to him. First Lori and then Carol. Daryl’s chest tightened in anger when she came asking for Rick. He was still angry at Rick for going in the first place, and if he hadn’t sucked the man’s cock or jerked him in a church before, he would have gone. As it stood though, he had acted like a pissy lover that was going to act like an asshole until the other realized they’re wrong. 

Looking back now, he wonders how things would have been different if he had gone to look for Rick and the others. Lori wouldn’t have crashed, and maybe he could have brought them back that night. He could have at least given them the upper hand with Randall’s shitty group. 

Of course, he could have ended up dead. Would anyone come looking for him?

Rick made a noise in his sleep, his frown lines etched deeply in his forehead. A nightmare. Daryl made a soft cooing noise to Rick, rubbing at his back and hushing him. He stayed like that until Rick relaxed in his arms again and the lines marring his face softened. 

_Rick would have come lookin’ for me…_

Daryl knew in his gut this was true. This man, their leader, was starting to hold Daryl to a different standard. It showed in how Rick had begun looking at him for confirmation on decisions or his opinions. It showed in how Rick reacted tonight. Daryl was no longer just some redneck fuck that was slightly useful to the groups survival, but a vital part of the group, Rick’s life, in keeping them together. 

The thought spread warmth through Daryl’s gut. This feeling of pride and belonging was something Daryl had longed for in his life. Yes, he was a Dixon, but what did that even mean in this world anymore? In the past world, it meant things like “stay away”, “caution”, “danger”, “trouble”, and “useless trash”. Not with Rick though. No, Daryl wasn’t those things and it showed. 

Yes, Rick was still married to Lori. That was fact. He was also the group’s leader. He was Carl’s father. He was strong, intelligent, caring, but also fragile. He was the same yet different from the men Daryl was so used to sleeping with.

He was also Daryl’s. 

Heavy eyelids finally closed for the night, a smile on his face when Daryl let sleep take him. Tomorrow would be a long day dealing with the aftermath of tonight and that shit stain Randall.

* * *

Daryl had made sure to wake up before the sun had risen so he could get Rick dressed and back to the house before anyone was the wiser. To their family, it just looked as if Rick and Daryl had woken early to handle Dale properly and were waiting on everyone else. 

That morning they held a service for Dale. It was something small and quiet, just like the ones before his. Daryl, once again, staying apart from their camp during the respects and his gut knotting in jealousy when Lori had reached out to rub Rick’s back. 

Everyone split and went their separate ways to prepare for the long day after that. There was tension in the air but no one within the group could really put their finger on if it was the Randall situation or the messy marital triangle that was the Grimes/Walsh situation. Several were also willing to put their money on the alpha male Rick/Shane tug of war going on in the camp. 

Daryl muscles were tense when he was out disposing of the undead with Shane, Andrea, and T-Dog. He tried to keep all conversation to a bare minimum when it came to Shane, but he noticed Andrea had gotten close to the guy as well, so he responded in single syllable words to her too. T-Dog was the only one to get full sentences from him, but even then they were short; he was exhausted from staying awake so late in the night with Rick. 

Not that he regretted it for a moment. He just didn’t think ahead and should have been asleep more than watching his worn out lover.

When everyone was back at camp, the sun was high in the sky and already making its descent into the earth. Rick was assigning tasks to each member of the camp to reinforce their safety after Hershel’s unspoken apology about not moving them in sooner. Watching Rick take the reins once more sent an electric shiver down Daryl’s spine and a warm heat pool in his belly. Rick was in his element when he commanded his leadership be taken seriously. 

Daryl was on the other side of the truck when he heard Rick tell Shane what his role would be, but his ears perked when he heard his own name spoken in that southern drawl of Rick’s. He made brief eye contact with Rick when the plan was laid out that he would be going with Rick to take Randall off to dump and he couldn’t help the smirk on his face. Selfishly, he wished he could see Shane’s reaction to the admittance of Daryl taking place as Rick’s right hand man. 

He quickly dropped his smirk when he saw Lori making a beeline towards the truck and up to him, deciding he would go ahead and leave the scene since Rick told him he would be doing double watch duty with T-dog. 

Daryl’s body seemed to have other things in mind when he took a quick glance down to notice how his pants had gotten just a little tighter. He caught up to T-dog fairly quickly, a man on a mission with a plan.

“T-Dog, hey man,” Daryl readjusted his crossbow on his shoulder, meeting the man’s eyes. “Hey, I gotta discuss somethin’ with Rick about droppin’ off our useless cargo before we head out. Ya cool with watchin’ by yerself for a lil’?”

“Yeah, man,” T-Dog nodded and motioned back towards the barn he was heading for. “You left him all tied up right? Doubt he will be a problem. I got it. You go on.”

Daryl grunted his appreciation and turned back to the Greene house, taking note of where everyone was and where they were heading off to. He lucked out when he saw Rick walking towards the house, ushering Carl off to help Beth and Hershel stock the basement.

“Come ‘ere,” Daryl fell in step with Rick, grabbing his elbow and squeezing slightly before letting go and leading him into the Greene home. He knew Rick would follow, even if the clunking noise of his boots didn’t give him away on the hard wood floors. Daryl walked through the home in confidence, glad almost everyone was doing something outside and didn’t even spare a glance at the two men walking upstairs. 

Daryl rolled his eyes at the look at confusion Rick gave him when they reached the bathroom, followed by him motioning for Rick to “hurry the fuck up and get inside”. Rick did as he was told, much to Daryl’s happiness. The sound of the door clicking was drowned out by the beginning of Rick asking a question and Daryl shoving him against the bathroom door, his mouth attacking Rick’s.

“W-woah! Daryl!” Rick gasped and clutched at Daryl’s vest, not pushing him away but not pulling him in either; he stood still and let Daryl set the pace and mood. The hunter worked his tongue past Rick’s lips, tasting him and rolling his hips against Rick’s own, pulling a moan from the older man.

“Pull yer pants down for me, Darlin’,” Daryl’s voice was deep and throaty as he spoke against Rick’s neck, deciding to taste the deputy’s skin there. Oh how he wanted to mark up his skin with bites and suck the skin until it blossomed with bruises. His marks showing Daryl had been there to claim him.

“Daryl, I don’t think we can do this now,” Rick’s head was tilted back to give Daryl more room to taste. His long fingers were working his belt open despite his weak doubt. 

“I’ll be real quick,” Daryl’s own hands met Rick’s, helping him with the button and zipper of his jeans, pushing them down Rick’s long bow legs while he dropped down to his knees as well. Rick’s gasp was loud in Daryl’s ears when the younger man took Rick’s hardening cock in one hand and stroked.

“Daryl! What’s gotten into you?”

“Seein’ ya back to yer old self and takin’ charge turned me on,” Daryl’s stormy eyes lifted up to Rick’s crystal blue ones when he licked his lips. “Just showin’ ya I appreciate ya.” 

With that, Daryl gave him a smirk before dragging his tongue flat against the tip of Rick’s dick, teasing at the slit. Rick took in a shuddery breath at the feel of Daryl’s hot tongue sliding along his length and one of his hands cupping his heavy balls. He let his eyes flutter shut when Daryl’s mouth enclosed around the head and he sucked down, taking Rick’s length with practiced ease. 

Daryl kept his eyes on Rick while he bobbed his head up and down other man’s cock, only letting soft moans escape his throat. His hand rubbing at Rick’s sac shifted back further to push at his perineum and rub it in time with his head. He meant it when he would make it quick, and if Rick tugging on his hair was any indication, his plan was working. 

Rick was rolling his hips against Daryl’s face, soft whimpers of Daryl’s name just quiet exhales. As much as Daryl loved hearing Rick yell and cry out, something he only really got to hear last night, he thoroughly enjoyed and got off on hearing Rick’s desperate whimpers. He shifted his hand further back to find Rick’s hole and rubbed his forefinger against it when he swallowed around Rick’s shaft, feeling a spurt of precome hit the back of his throat. Daryl pulled off quickly, licking his lips.

“Why’d ya stop?” Rick’s eyes opened slightly, his pupils blown and looking very much in a lust filled daze. Sweat was just starting to gather along his brow. Oh how Daryl wanted to ruin this man instead of taking some piece of shit off in the woods to dump off.

“Turn around,” Daryl grunted and readjusted his own cock in his pants. “Gonna eat ya out.” The blush on Rick’s face was almost too much for Daryl. 

“You don’t gotta-“

“Grimes.”

“Yes sir.”

When Rick turned around and placed his hands on the bathroom door, the sight was one of the raunchiest things Daryl had been blessed to see. Rick’s perfect, smooth muscled ass in his face; the man even made a point to spread his legs as far as his pants would let him. When Daryl hadn’t done anything for a few long, quiet moments, Rick turned his head back over his shoulder to see if he had done something wrong.

And **that** would forever be burned in Daryl’s brain. When he died, this would be the last thing he would see. 

“Jesus Christ.”

“Daryl? Did I- Oooh!” Rick’s hands curled against the door, his body subconsciously moving away from Daryl’s tongue. The man in question let out a growl and grabbed Rick’s ass, spreading him wide and delving his tongue between his cheeks; running along his seam and wiggling against his hole. Rick made soft gasping noises, finally biting his lip hard to try and hide his breathless pleasure. 

Daryl could hear commotion downstairs grow louder and he knew their time was drawing to a close. 

“Darlin’, ya with me?” Daryl reluctantly pulled his mouth away from the task at hand, groaning at the sight of Rick’s hole slick with his spit. His cock twitched in his pants at the thought of just pushing his swollen dick inside to feel that tight, burning grip. 

“Y-Yeah? Daryl, please…” Rick whispered to Daryl, helpless plea heard only by him. 

“I know, I know. I wanna make ya come from just this, believe me, but we ain’t got time for that,” Daryl had taken to rubbing one of his thumbs against Rick’s twitching hole, pushing it in just slightly. “I’mma need ya to jerk it, Darlin’. I want ya comin’ on my tongue. Can ya do that?”

Rick’s gasp was his response and Daryl knew then that his lover had done what was requested. When Daryl could hear the sounds of slick skin being worked over he took that as his cue to continue his own task. 

Daryl spread Rick open again and dove in. He dragged his tongue up along his hole quickly, soaking the skin there and could feel it drip down past; no doubt traveling to Rick’s balls. Daryl could feel Rick’s muscles tense in his hands, his hips bucking back and forth the chase his orgasm and try to get more friction from either end. He held on to Rick tight to keep him in place and pushed his face flush against Rick’s ass, wiggling the tip of his tongue past the tight ring of muscle.

Rick was gone after that.

With a bitten off gasp and helpless whine, Rick’s body shook with his orgasm. Daryl could feel Rick’s hole twitch and, on impulse, forced his tongue deeper inside his lover. If his mouth wasn’t preoccupied, he would have chuckled at how Rick reacted; bucking back against Daryl’s face, shoving his ass against it.

Daryl slide his tongue out and wiped his face with the back of his hand. He stood behind Rick, but not before laying a teasing slap on Rick’s ass. Rick had his head resting on the door, trying to get his breathing under control. Daryl crowded up behind Rick, grinding his hard on against Rick’s ass, groaning against his ear and kissing his neck. 

“Fuck, wouldn’t take me long to come… Doin’ that to ya and hearin’ ya make those noises was fuckin’ hot, Darlin’.”

“What’s stoppin’ you?” Rick turned his head to meet Daryl’s eyes. He tilted his head back just slightly, his mouth barely brushing against his lover’s. “I want you to come too, Daryl. I shouldn’t be the only one… You always let me. I wanna make you.” 

Daryl went cross eyed when Rick rolled his hips back against Daryl’s. He bit at Rick’s shoulder to muffle his groan, the deputy smirking at the reaction he got from the redneck with his sudden sexual confidence. One of Daryl’s arms wrapped around Rick’s waist to hold him close, his other hand quickly working his pants open to free his leaking cock. 

“Fuck, I wanna fuck ya so bad. Ya got no idea, Grimes,” Daryl grunted in Rick’s ear, his hand directing his thick cock between Rick’s wet ass cheeks, sliding the length there. The quick change of Rick’s expression from confidence to surprise was comical. Daryl took to kissing on Rick’s neck, holding him tight, and whispering soft promises to the other man while he fucked between his flesh.

“I’mma get ya so loose and wet, Darlin’. I’m gonna find some slick so I can just slide my cock right in. You’ll still be tight as Hell, won’t ya? Never had a cock in ya before. Mine will be the first and only one, ain’t that right?”

“Y-Yeah. Only you. Fuck, Daryl… Please come… Wanna feel-“

“Oh don’t ya worry, Grimes. I’m gonna come,” Daryl felt the shudder run up his spine, the tension between his legs build. “Gonna mark ya up. Gonna cover ya. Then when we’re drivin’ I’mma blow ya again and finger that amazing ass of yers. Ya want that?”

“Oh fuck, Daryl-“

“Ah! S-Shit!”

Daryl pressed his forehead on the back of Rick’s neck, biting his lip and quickly shoving the back of Rick’s shirt up. He barely had the fabric up in time to miss coming all over it. There’s no way they could explain Rick’s sudden wardrobe change without raising suspicion. 

Rick arched his back slightly, giving Daryl a seductive view of his spine, hips, and ass on display painted white with Daryl’s come. The visual would be added to his spank bank that was quickly filling with real events that were occurring between the two of them. Fantasies no longer needed.

“Fuck, that was good,” Daryl hummed, catching his breath and taking a moment to himself. When the wonderful haze of his orgasm started lifting, he stepped back to get a better view of Rick. He subconsciously licked his lips as he tucked his softening cock back in his pants, fixing his clothing. “Ya look so good like this… I like seein’ ya covered with my come. Shows you’re mine.”

“Ya, well enjoy it while ya can. I’m not walking around like this,” Rick snorted, turning to face Daryl while grabbing a hand towel to clean himself off. Surely the Greene’s wouldn’t notice a missing towel. 

“Hmm, maybe later you can,” Daryl crouched to retrieve his crossbow he had dumped on the floor earlier. “I’d really like it if ya walked around with my come in ya.”

Rick suddenly dropped the wet towel to the floor; his face flooding with color at Daryl’s idea. His crystal blue eyes wide in disbelief at what the other man just said. Daryl just chuckled, grabbed the towel off the floor, made Rick turn around and help clean him quickly, and if honest, not so well. Not like Rick would know if maybe _a little_ come still stained his skin. Just a little.

“I’ll leave first. Be on the porch waitin’ for ya, Darlin’,” Daryl tossed the towel on the floor while Rick pulled his pants up, wiggling his hips slightly and making a face. “Don’t take long. We’re gonna start losing daylight.”

Daryl couldn’t help the smile on his face when he slipped out of the bathroom, thinking of the pleased surprise on Rick’s own when Daryl gave him a lighthearted kiss on the lips before walking out.

* * *

“Take him out to Senoia. Hour there, hour back. Give or take. May lose the light, but we’ll be halfway home by then.”

“This whole pain in the ass will be a distant memory,” Daryl couldn’t help but smirk at his wording at poor attempt at a joke. Rick snorted and rolled his eyes. His heart much lighter around Daryl as a result from last night. Daryl sat on the wooden banister of the porch and watched Rick. The man was so composed, one wouldn’t think he had just had his pants down around his ankles with another man’s face between his cheeks.

“Carol’s putting together some provisions for us. Enough to last a few days,” Rick glanced at Daryl briefly at the implication, the man smirking for just a slight moment before he turned at the sound of a car speeding up.

_Shane._

“That thing you did last night,” Rick’s words broke Daryl from his general despising of Shane. His stormy blue eyes looked up at Rick’s own blues, Rick licking his lips and looking away. It was obvious something heavy was on his mind and he was having trouble getting it out; trying to put it into words but fearing how it would come out. 

“Ain’t no reason ya should do all the heavy liftin’,” Daryl looked back up at Rick to drive the point home that he was there for their leader; there for his lover. He would be his strength when Rick needed it.

Rick lowered his eyes but nodded his head. Daryl thought he would say more, waited for him to continue. He noted the shaky inhale Rick took, but the moment was lost when Shane pulled on to the lawn in a cloud of dust. Daryl jerked to look back at the car, irritation flashing on his face.

“So are ya good with all this?” His attention quickly going back to Rick. He wanted to scream at Shane to give them a few more fuckin’ minutes, but it was clear Rick needed the subject change. 

“I don’t see you and I tradin’ haymakers on the side o’ the road,” Daryl looked up at Rick, sarcasm evident in his voice. Confusion painted Rick’s face at the thought of Daryl fighting him. “Nobody’d win that fight.”

He wanted it clear that he saw Rick and himself as equals.

Daryl took the map from Rick just to have something to do with his hands. He looked back at Shane when he heard his steps; his gut tightening with dread at the evident confrontation Shane and Rick would have. As much as he wanted to stay around Rick to show his support, he was afraid **he** and Shane would be the ones trading haymakers if he stayed any longer.

Daryl glanced back at Rick to see the man just staring at Shane. Rick’s eyes were distant. He was deep in his own thoughts and it was obvious to Daryl that there was no way to bring him back to level ground. It made him really want to punch Shane for dragging Rick back in to the toxic headspace he had just pulled Rick out of the night before. He tossed the map in front of Rick, snapping the older man out of his haze.

“I’m gonna go take a piss.”

_I’ll just have to work twice as hard to fix what’s about the be undone._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bother me on tumblr!! vulgarsequins.tumblr


	4. Angels Burning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick and Daryl are split up when Shane announces Randal's escape. Daryl's a mess of emotions and on the verge of giving up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo long time no see. Since what's been happening in the season, I was thankful to notice I left this horribly unattended fic in the perfect place for Rick and Daryl to be reunited. Our poor fandom needs it, because last week's episode was fuckin' brutal!! Unbeta'd because I'm impatient and need to get to work. OOops

Night had fallen quicker than anyone had anticipated, helping amplify Daryl’s bundle of anxiety, dread, and irritation. He was grateful that Glenn was quiet beside him, trying his best to help Daryl track Randall, but the archer knew the poor kid didn't have the first clue on what to look for. Glenn had never gone hunting or was with him when he was trying to track Sophia, so Daryl knew all Glenn could see was layers upon layers of dead leaves crunching underneath their feet. Even with that working against him, at least he was quieter than Rick. The mental jab at the other man gave his lips a small quirk on the corners.

Dread continued to climb up Daryl’s spine and settle at the base of his skull the longer they were out in the wooded area. Nothing about this sounded right, and he was uneasy about being separated from the others, but especially Rick. Yes, they needed to find Randall, but something about this didn’t sound right the moment Shane had come storming out of the woods looking like a mad man.

* * *

 

_“He took my gun!”_

_All it took were those words for everyone in the blended group to panic. Too many people were talking at once for Daryl to focus on anything but the white noise around him and the blood on Shane’s face. It looked like his nose was broken, and Daryl couldn’t help but wish Randall had done more damage to the man._

_If Randall even was the one to do that._

_Rick slipped in to his element at the news, commanding everyone that wasn’t Shane, Glenn, or Daryl to seek protection in the Greene home with T-Dog and Hershel to stand guard. The former deputy wasted no time falling in step with Shane, much like Daryl imagined was second nature to both of them; Glenn and Daryl following with weapons drawn. Daryl noted that only Rick and Shane had firearms while Glenn was holding a wicked looking blade that Daryl wasn’t quite sure the other man had even had a chance to use yet. He hoped the kid wouldn’t need to use it and they would find Randall quick. This was not the time to try and figure out if you picked a weapon suitable for your fighting stance._

_Shane continued to lead through the wooded area with a focused look in his eyes and a clenched jaw. When they made it to a clearer section of trees, Daryl started to hesitate in his steps. The dread inside him was growing the further they got from their group at Hershel’s farm. His eyes scanned the leaves and dirt surrounding him, confusion starting to slip in-between the cracks of irritation and caution._

_“Can you track him?” Rick was at his side, trying to look for himself for any clues about where their captor went._

_“Nah, I don’t see nothing,” Daryl mumbled slowly, eyes never leaving the fallen debris. Randall was injured, Daryl had made sure of that the night before. His brain whispering that memory to him caused him to furrow his brows further. This didn’t make sense. There should be obvious tracks; tracks even Rick should be able to see. There should be blood and a trail that looks like Randall plowed through. The kid would have made Shane drag him away._

_“No use in tracking him,” Shane’s voice was impatient and gruff, snapping Daryl right in to the present. “He went that way. We just need to pair up and spread out.”_

_“Kid weighs a buck twenty-five soaking wet,” Daryl’s steel blue eyes finally left the ground to look at Shane. His expression was obvious, a mask of disbelief and annoyance for the other man. His heart rate kicked up a notch while his brain geared itself up for a fight. He had been waiting for a chance to take Shane down a notch since Rick came back to the farm with his injuries from the other day. “You tryin’ to tell us he got the jump on you?”_

_“I say a rock pretty much evens those odds, wouldn’t you?” Shane was quick to spit back, his chest already puffing at the challenge. Daryl turned his body to face Shane, ready to deliver on his dislike for how Shane had been treating Rick._

_“All right, knock it off!” Rick was between the two of them, asserting his position of dominance before either man could get another jab out. He was blocking Daryl’s view to Shane, keeping his eyes locked with Daryl’s. The tension in Daryl hiked up further, not liking the fact that Rick had his back turned to Shane. Offering one’s back was the last thing to do if someone wanted you dead and they had nothing to lose. “You and Glenn start heading up the right flank. Me and Shane will take the left.”_

_If Daryl thought that he couldn’t grow more tense, Rick was sure to prove him wrong. Dread and reluctance to leave Rick with this man settled deep in his bones and his instincts screamed at him to refuse. He didn’t like this idea at all. Splitting up is what Shane wanted, and the situation at hand was created by Shane. Now Rick was going to go off with this man? The same one that no doubt was the cause of Rick’s injuries? Injuries that Rick had refused to tell Daryl about, or at least the real cause to why his skin was bruised and cut. Rick had given Daryl some bull shit excuse about walkers, but the other man knew that was a lie before Rick had finished telling the tale. Daryl’s had more than his fair share of whelps and cuts from fists._

_Now Rick was walking away with Shane, and Daryl couldn’t do anything but follow Rick’s orders and hope they found Randall quickly._

* * *

 

It was now past the point of trying to find tracks without some light source. Thankfully, Glenn had thought to carry a flashlight when they had first started the trek through the woods. Daryl led them both back to were they had started, biting back an annoyed response he wanted to use when Glenn pointed out that they were in fact where they had started. Daryl hadn’t found any tracks where they were minutes before, so this was the best he could do with trying to find any now.

It didn’t take long to find the type of tracks Daryl knew they were meant to find in the first place He wanted to kick himself many times over for letting the adrenaline and panic get to him in the first place to over look them. Daryl had almost forgotten Glenn was there with him; which said something about either his focus or that Glenn was in fact quieter than he anticipated. He doubted the younger man could see what he could, but it wouldn’t hurt their chances if Daryl shared the crucial information. Glenn did have younger eyes.

“Two sets of tracks here,” Daryl kept his eyes trained on the ground, hoping Glenn wasn’t too absorbed in trying to see what he was seeing and could keep one ear out for possible danger. It was better to have their senses split between the tracks and their surroundings. “Shane must have followed him a lot longer than he said.”

That small piece of knowledge sent up another warning flag in the growing bouquet of caution and anxiety for Daryl. Nothing that Shane had said earlier was making sense. The situation was bogus and it kept nagging at Daryl. 

“There’s fresh blood on this tree,” Daryl raised the flashlight to the bark, his eyes narrowing to examine it better. “There’s more tracks. Looks to be walkin’ in tandem.” 

If Daryl was a lesser man, which was saying a lot, he would have punched Glenn hard for spooking him. He would never admit that Glenn got the jump on him, and he was thankful that it was so dark and the younger man was so caught off guard himself, that he didn’t notice the jerk in his own body. He needed Glenn on full alert, but not in “spooked cat” mode. After the glare thrown at Glenn and the apology followed, Daryl looked back to follow the tracks.

“Yeah, there was a little dust up right here. Trail is kicked up.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean something went down.”

“It’s getting weird.” Daryl had to keep from rolling his eyes at Glenn’s understatement. 

“Had a little trouble,” seeing Randall’s blindfold made Daryl’s gut drop out from him. Glenn picked it up and they stared at each other for a breath before rustling caught their attention.

Of all the things they thought they would find out in the woods walking with them, Randall’s walking corpse was not one of them. Daryl panicked when Glenn went down in the struggle, cursing himself when his arrow didn’t meet it’s intended target. However, Glenn proved his merit by using his blade against Randall, hacking at its head repeatedly. Daryl had to hand it to the kid, when the threat of survival was forefront, he gave as good as he got. 

When they both knew Randall wasn’t going to get up from Glenn’s shoddy, but effective, bludgeon, Daryl examined the corpse. After turning Randall this way and that, assuring Glenn that there was no bites, it felt like an ice bucket of water dumped over his body. His instincts were back to screaming danger in his brain.

His momma always said to trust those instincts. 

* * *

 

That feeling only amplified when Daryl and Glenn had rushed back to Hershel’s home. When he was met with everyone but the man he needed to see most, his heart stopped. His eyes scanned the room and faces before throwing the question out about where Shane and Rick where. The sound of a gunshot before Glenn and Daryl got to the farm sent him running faster than he can ever remember running in the past. Faster than any of the times cops were chasing him and Merle. Faster than he had ever run out to the woods to get away from his daddy. 

Daryl and Glenn both explained how they had found Randall; that the gun shot was not connected to their dead-undead escapee. Daryl couldn’t be angry or fault Lori for the panic in her eyes or the urgency in her voice; he couldn’t and refused to because he was feeling the same things she was and wasn’t that ironic? The shunned wife and the secret lover agreeing on something. They were both scared because their leader, the man they cared about in some degree or another, was out there with a man that neither of them had come to trust; though, Daryl never did trust Shane, but he didn’t want to bark out “I said so”’s. He didn’t hesitate to rush out the front door when Lori asked him to find Rick.

However, he didn’t get very far, the scene greeting him stopping him and the others in their tracks. There were walkers, had to be hundreds of them, marching across the fields to the Greene farm. It felt like his heart was swallowed up, no longer taking residence in his chest.

_Where the fuck are ya Rick?_

Daryl could only faintly hear Lori’s announcement of Carl’s sudden disappearance, but the blood rushing in his ears filtered out most of what she said. They were truly screwed if they didn’t just  bolt. His mind started racing with escape routes. They were wasting time! Maybe if they left now, he would have a chance to circle around the herd, maybe find Rick. 

 _If he was alive, his ass would’a been here barkin’ orders_. _He’s dead._

The voice gloating to him sounded an awful lot like Merle and that thought snapped him in to action, moving to load up guns and grab his crossbow. Anything he had left in his small tent away from the Greene home was lost. It wasn’t worth the risk of going to get anything useless there. His gut felt empty and his chest ached. Daryl cursed at himself for being emotionally distracted; anger growing at the realization of what this all meant when he started thinking of how much more he may have lost beside small physical items if Rick was truly out there dead.

Daryl’s eyes scanned the herd making their way over and his heart sank further. There was no way out of this alive. There was too many. What the hell were they doing staying here? They had to leave. Rick would have told them to leave now. He had to get these people out of here, but he knew they wouldn’t listen to him. Never would.

“I got the number,” Daryl looked to Andrea, Glenn, Maggie and Hershel. “It’s no use.” He watched Maggie hand Glenn a rifle, mentioning how growing up country, you learn a thing or two. His mind provided images of himself and Merle running through the woods, letting experience and failed attempts teach them harsh lessons that wouldn’t have left as many bruises and scars if they had a father that actually gave a shit about them; one that taught them these lessons before they started fending for themselves and hiding from their own blood. Sadness at the thought and the feeling of defeat started creeping up his spine, the latter emotion a new one to him. He had always fought for his existence, but now…

“You can go if you want,” Hershel’s words jarred him. The man was speaking to those that weren’t part of his clan, but his eyes fell on Daryl. 

“You gonna take ‘em all on?” Daryl furrowed his brows. This old coot truly was fucking nuts.

“We have guns,” Hershel cocked a rifle in a dramatic fashion to emphasize his words. “We have cars.”

“Kill as many as we can, then we use the cars to lead them off the farm,” Andrea glanced to everyone while she spoke, but her eyes too landed on Daryl. It caused him to pause. Why was she looking at him as if to see if he approved of her plan?

“Are you serious?” Daryl more spoke to Andrea than Hershel, but the other man responded anyway.

“This is my farm. I’ll die here.”

“All right,” Daryl shrugged, looking out to the field before making his way off the porch. His heart was still a pit, but at least he would go out in true Dixon fashion; middle finger in the air in a sea of gunfire. “As good as a night as any.”

* * *

 

_It has to be him…_

Daryl’s eyes caught sight of bright yellow and orange flames that were licking up the sides of the farm before anyone; making a beeline to the fence that remained standing as a weak border to keep walkers out. He drove right up to the fence, quickly shifting the bike in to neutral so that he could grab his pistol and shoot the walker closest to him. His mind registered that T-Dog and Maggie had driven off to lure some of the herd away while Andrea and Glenn shot at what walkers they could. Jimmy pulled he RV up the opening of the gate.

His thin lip curled in annoyance as he shot at walkers; feeling like he went through bullets way faster than he counted off. He knew it was time to leave when he ran out of rounds and the walkers were breaking the fence down. Daryl drove up to the RV, stopping before needing to bolt once more, both men looking at the glowing barn.

“Yo, must’ve been Rick or Shane who started that fire,” Daryl yelled over the noise of walkers, gun shots, and the inferno in front of them. Jimmy stuck his head out to frantically look between the barn and Daryl. This kid was scared shitless and for good reason. It was smart for Jimmy to have grabbed the RV, though it felt wrong to Daryl considering the kid didn’t really know Dale at all. However, Glenn was riding around with Maggie, so beggars couldn’t be choosers. “Why don’t you circle ‘round? Go!”

Jimmy nodded to him and started moving the RV to the barn. Daryl watched on and wished it was him going to check, but he knew that was suicide on his bike. His chest ached and hope warred with the feeling of loss. Rick had to be the reason for the barn catching fire. He **had** to be the reason. Daryl knew Rick would need help if that was the case; walkers being drawn to the flame. Unless…

It was Shane that started the fire. 

Rage bubbled up Daryl’s throat and a growl escaped before he realized the noise came from him and not the walkers now turning their attention to him. If Shane lived through this and Rick die-didn’t- Daryl knew he would strangle the man with his bare hands. No one would stop him; no one **could** stop him. So he just sent a little prayer up to his momma that this would work out, and they would survive somehow. 

* * *

 

Maybe praying to his momma wasn’t the best choice.

Daryl, still sitting on his bike as it rumbled in neutral, watched the skeleton of the barn engulfed in flames that grew higher and higher into the night sky. There were no signs of Maggie or Glenn. No signs of Andrea, T-Dog, Lori, Carl, Hershel, or Carol. None of Shane.

_Or Rick…_

He clenched his jaw, molars creaking under the pressure. A lot of emotions and memories played across his vision. Red hot recollections of his house burning up with his momma inside coupled with the belief that Rick suffered the same fate. Childhood fears of loneliness resurfacing because the farm was quiet; no screams or sounds of his friends trying to fight for their lives could be heard. 

He was by himself now. He thought about staying around until morning light; check the bodies to see if he truly was alone in this world now. That thought made him uncomfortable and his stomach lurch. Merle would no doubt be calling him by his embarrassing pet name, but also giving him shit for caring about these people. Which Daryl could freely admit that he now did. He was the outsider, the spitting alley cat that refused to be part of them but would still bring them dead gifts secretly hoping they would accept them in their circle. However something changed. The dynamics of the group and his own mind changed, and it all pointed to one man.

_Rick._

Rick had always treated him as an equal human, even when Daryl snarled and threw squirrels at him. Rick went to Atlanta with him to search for his brother, when he didn’t have to. T-Dog joined and later Daryl returned the favor saving that man’s ass from the herd. Rick asked him about his skills in hunting, rather than demanded it from him. Rick never asked for something Daryl didn’t feel comfortable giving, and he never pushed. 

That night in the church wasn’t the beginning of Rick treating him differently. No. That night did start a domino effect that would change Daryl’s own views from lust, sex, and primal need to something that he was afraid to give a label. Something that had left him open and flayed in the past when it backfired on him. 

_Looks like this time ain’t different. Hell, don’ know if it’s better this way than losin’ to a wife. ‘least I didn’ go do somethin’ dumb like say I-_

A scream snapped him right out of his thoughts. 

* * *

 

Carol clutched tight to his sides and chest as they rode through the woods. He may not have been able to save Sophia, but at least he could save her momma.

* * *

 

The sun was just making its way over the treetops as Daryl drove down the highway, Carol still attached to him but her grip no longer tight enough to cause bruising. The blood on his face had dried quickly after grabbing her and getting her the hell out of dodge; it tugged on his skin and felt familiar, which was unsettling. His eyes felt dry from lack of any protection, and he was surprised when Carol had refused to exchange her seat on the back of his bike for a seat with Glenn or Maggie in their vehicle when they ran in to them. 

Daryl found the two first on the side of the road. His heart jerked when he saw the Korean kid and the country sweetheart; glad the two had made it away from the farm in one piece, regardless of the many walker pieces covering their car. With a quick conversation to make sure everyone was okay, unbitten and shaken, but okay, they started their drive for safety again. 

Finding the truck that had T-Dog, Lori, and Beth was another swift chance of luck on his part. T-Dog had asked if the four of them was all they had found, which Daryl could have punched him in the face for a dumb ass obvious question, but he just grunted and nodded. His eyes avoided Lori’s glassy ones; understanding they both lost something valuable if this was all that was left. 

However Daryl felt like he had no right to feel the same as her. She lost her son and husband, while he lost…

Hell, he didn’t even know. A leader? A friend? Safety? A fuck?

He wished Carol wasn’t riding with him. It’s not that she made him uncomfortable, that time had long passed. She was his friend. She never wished ill on him, never spoke bad of him or hell, pulled a weapon on him. No, he wished she had taken a seat with Glenn and Maggie so he could pull the throttle a little more; take off down the road in his mess of emotions that was exhausting him. So instead, he drove on, leading their small caravan of survivors. By no means was he calling the leader position, that wasn’t for him. That was for…

The son of a bitch staring at him coming down the highway. 

Daryl had to remember he was driving and that he had to worry about the safety of Carol behind him, but damn if he didn't want to jump off his bike and take off in a sprint; and he fucking hated running. Carl was with him, and so was old man Hershel, but no sign of Shane could be seen. Daryl cut through the grassy median, Carol holding on tight a the sudden change of direction and texture of road. His eyes never left Rick while the other man jogged between cars to meet them. He didn’t look hurt, but like everyone else, he was sporting his share of blood. Daryl just hoped it wasn’t any of his.

Carol moved off the bike once he stopped, but he was having a hard time putting the bike in neutral to shut it off properly. Looking back, he can’t remember if he ever did, or just let it stall out. He remembers not caring though when Rick finally was in front of him though, reaching out. 

Rick’s hand trembled in his for the briefest moment they made contact. Daryl’s heart swelled and he tightened his hand around Rick’s, not wanting to let go. He wanted to greet the man in a much different way, but considering his son was right there, and they had an audience, this was the best he could do. Daryl would give his left arm if it meant checking Rick over for injury, asking what in the hell happened last night, and tracing his lips over his skin just to memorize the feel and taste incase they were forced apart once more. Their glance was quick and fleeting, Rick’s eyes searching through their other survivors. Daryl knew what was coming next, tried to brace himself for the feeling. He heard Lori’s voice and suddenly his hand was cold.

Daryl moved off his bike to stand beside Carol and watch as Rick hugged Lori and Carl. Watch as he kisses her cheek in relief as they have their moment. Daryl felt perverted just watching the intimacy as jealousy bubbled up inside his chest, threatening to spill out his throat. Even Hershel and his daughters had a family reunion and it dawned on Daryl that he’s alone in this and cast aside. The jealousy starts to turn in to rage before it’s suddenly snuffed out quicker than it started.

Carol wrapped her pinky around his own, squeezing with a strength that he wouldn’t expect. When he glanced over to her, she’s smiling with hopeful tears in her eyes. She motions off to her side and his vision goes to a wide grinning T-Dog then a goofy smiling Glenn. Leave it to the woman that’s lost all, to remind him that he’s not alone and that they aren’t strangers anymore. It’s his first hint, after what he assumes is many that he never grasped and realized, that this broken housewife, can see through him. Carol can see through him in a way that Merle could, but couldn't at the same time; but unlike his brother would never use it against him for any gain. 

There is no way he was going to survive this much emotional back and forth. 

“Where’d you find everyone?” Rick’s voice snapped him back to where he now stood, having extracted himself from Lori and Carl; his intense blue eyes looking at Daryl with so much relief. 

“Well, those guys’ taillights zigzagging all over the road,” Daryl motioned to Glenn. “Figured he had to be asian, drivin’ like that.”

“Good one,” Glenn actually chuckled at Daryl’s joke. The air was full of happiness.

“Where’s the rest of us?” Daryl wished he wasn’t the one to bring up the question. Wished he wasn’t the one that affectively killed the mood. Daryl’s eyes never wavered from Rick, though the other man looked at whoever was speaking at the time.

“We’re the only ones who made it so far,” Rick was hesitant to speak, that much was obvious. The conversation starting to go to questionable territory. As far as Daryl was concerned, there was only one person of their group missing. He had seen the deaths that happened last night and wanted to tell Rick that, but Lori spoke up first.

“Shane?”

Rick shook his head and begun to turn his body away from Lori, not watching her expression. However, Daryl watched her, saw how that realization hit her. Daryl felt solace in knowing he wouldn’t have to deal with the angry, deranged man again. He knew it was selfish, but Shane was causing more problems than solutions towards the end. Now though, watching Lori’s eyes gain that lost look in them, set Daryl off. Fury flared deep in his chest.

_Fuckin’ kiddin’ me? Didn’t even know if Rick or yer kid was alive, get them back, and yer gonna get all emotional over the guy that wanted Rick dead?!_

His lip twitched in the beginnings of a snarl as Carol squeezed her pinky around his again when Glenn directed the conversation elsewhere. If the blood wasn’t rushing in his ears, he would have heard a sigh of relief from one of his companions that they weren’t all about to be subject to another martial spat between the Grimes.

 

“Andrea?”

The happy reunion now long passed as the body toll started racking up points. Andrea, Patricia, and Jimmy, all lost and confirmed when someone spoke of how their loved ones met their demise. 

“Did you see her?” Carol asked softly when no one could confirm about Andrea’s whereabouts and wether or not she was actually taken.

“I’m going back,” Daryl grunted and pulled away from Carol. Andrea was one death he didn’t see with his two eyes, and like fuck he was just going to sit around and leave-

“No,” Rick’s command was firm and left no room for argument. Daryl stopped getting on his bike, looking at Rick.

“We can’t just leave her,” Daryl’s brow furrowed, his voice taking a hint of disbelief that Rick actually was going through with this.

“We don’t even know if she’s there,” Lori said softly, but firm in her agreement with her husband. It just made Daryl want to yell and throw something.

“She isn’t there. She isn’t,” Rick spoke quickly, his eyes not meeting anyone’s but avoiding Daryl’s most. “She’s somewhere else or she’s **dead**. There’s no way to find her.”

“We’re not even going to look for her?” Glenn surprised them by questioning Rick, similar disbelief seeping in his tone.

“We gotta keep moving,” Rick’s command was final. “There have been walkers crawling all over here.” As if the powers that be, one of the dead bastards started making their way up the road.

“I say we go east,” T-Dog threw out the suggestion.

“Stay off the main roads,” Daryl reinforced, accepting that they were going to leave one of their own out to fend for themselves. He wanted to look for her, but a voice in the back of his mind, again sounding an awful lot like Merle, severed that train of thought.

_And look what good that did ya lookin’ for that broad’s kid. Gotcha an arrow in yer side, bleedin’ like a stuck pig. Then that blonde bitch ya wanna go fuckin’ find, shot ya-_

“The bigger the road, the more walkers, the more assholes like this one,” Daryl hefted up his crossbow, making his way over to the walker in the sweater. He would have taken a knife to the poor bastard, but he was already covered in dried walker guts. No one else in the group moved as they watched him walk unnecessarily close for the kill. “I got ‘em.”

He stalked up to the, now immobile, walker to rip his bolt out of its eye socket. He cleaned off the blood on his pant leg, ignoring the irony in that. He swung his crossbow down to his side and kept walking forward. “I’m gonna check these cars ‘for we go.”

“Daryl-“ 

He ignored Rick’s shout, just walking on. He could hear murmurs behind him as the group discussed what to do now, how to go about leaving the highway. Daryl turned around one of the turned over semi trucks, just needing a moment to sort everything out; a moment to get his emotions under control. When he heard Rick’s boots hitting the asphalt, he tensed. Not now.

“Daryl,” Rick rounded the corner, his steps slowing to a stop when he saw Daryl taking deep breaths through his nose. “Daryl, hey, talk to me. Look, I’m sorry about Andrea, but that’s just what’s best for us; we gotta get out of here, away from that herd. Hey, talk to me.”

When Rick reached out to touch his arm, through barely a graze, it gave Daryl pause before turning to the leader; wanting to unleash his anger, grief, fear, all these emotions building inside his heart on Rick, consequence be dammed.

Neither of them were expecting the fierce, rough kiss initiated by Daryl grabbing Rick’s jacket and yanking him forward. Daryl broke the kiss when Rick didn’t respond, his heart racing and already thinking the worst. What changed-

Then it was Rick’s turn to shove his lips against Daryl’s thin ones. Their kisses were frantic and hurried; Daryl gripping the sides of Rick’s face while Rick clutched at Daryl’s waist. It felt like they kissed for long minutes, but it was only seconds when Daryl broke their sudden make out. He rested his forehead on Rick’s, still holding on to his jaw.

“I thought you were dead, you son of a bitch,” Daryl panted against Rick’s lips.

“I thought **you** were dead,” Rick’s eyes looked in to Daryl’s, not caring if everything was a blur and unfocused. “How-“

“Don’t fuckin’ matter,” Daryl kissed Rick one more time before breaking away completely. He didn’t want to, God knows he didn’t, but kissing Rick out here with their group so close was the dumbest thing he had done in awhile. “What the fuck happened, Rick? What happened with Shane?”

Rick looked away from Daryl at the mention of his dead friend. He shook his head and bit his lip before pinching the bridge of his nose. He turned his body away from Daryl, but stopped when Daryl touched his arm. He was about to tell Rick to forget it; he didn’t need to know or care, that he was just grateful that Rick was safe.

“I killed him,” Rick croaked out. “He had a gun to my face and I fuckin’ stabbed him, Daryl.” Daryl’s eyes widened at the confession, but let Rick continue. “Then Carl was there, saw the whole thing. How the fuck does he keep doin’ that?” A wet chuckle. “He- my boy- he shot Shane when he came back, turned. Thought he was gonna shoot me. We saw the herd and started runnin’. Set the barn on fire-“

“Knew that was you,” Daryl broke in. Rick stared at him, tilting his head as he would trying to figure something out. “I knew that was you. I sent Jimmy to find ya.”

“He did. He…”

“I know,” Daryl nodded and pulled Rick to him again. “He saved ya and yer boy… ‘m thankful ya got out safe.. Scared me shitless, man.”

“Me too,” Rick mumbled. “Thought everyone was dead. Couldn’t find ya…”

“We’re together again,” Daryl kissed Rick’s temple, the moment so intimate and unfamiliar to him but he couldn’t stop himself. It felt like something he always wanted, but the events leading him here with Rick were anything by happy. “All o’ us. We’ll be okay. Come on, ‘fore they come lookin’ and I gotta explain why we’re suckin’ face.”

Rick let out a surprised snort at the joke, thankful for the humor to break up the tension and grief. They both knew Daryl was right; this wasn’t the place for intimacy or the time for it. Daryl placed one more kiss against Rick’s lips. It was soft and tender, speaking of relief and care. Reassurance that they were alive, that this wasn’t a dream. 

When he pulled away, he nodded to Rick. They were going to be okay. Their family was going to get through this. This was the worst so far and it would take hellfire and the devil himself to separate him and Rick again like this.

Unfortunately, the future would bring many devils cloaked in the flames of hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> be friends with me on tumblr!! I love talking to people and I'm a dork. <3


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